I love to give gifts, just as much as I like to receive them. I even like shopping for gifts, trying to figure out what each person would like. The experience of seeing faces light up when they open a gift and find something they like is invaluable. Of course there is always a down side to this experience – one has to keep track of sales and find the time to go shopping, then stand patiently in the long lines at the check out counters. And there is always the question of trying to limit spending to a pre-planned budget. But to me personally, the tedium of the shopping experience is a minor irritant given the greater joy of giving, be it at Christmas, Diwali, Durga Puja, birthdays or anniversaries. 

Unfortunately, such occasions have become highly commodified. The retail industry has transformed the nature of gift giving. Giving is now considered a necessary pain, people often buy things on sale throughout the year and then try to match appropriate gifts with people on their lists, reducing the experience of giving and receiving to a mechanical exchange of material goods. We often give merely because we are expected to, knowing that the gift will probably be returned or exchanged. The monetary value of the gift is often given much more importance than the thought that has gone behind it. 

However, I still feel very strongly about the act of giving gifts to people you care for. It need not be an expensive gift, it could be something you crafted yourself, but it is a way of saying you care. As an NRI, living far away from our families, it takes on even greater significance, as our friends become our extended families in our diasporic world, and exchanging gifts replicates the sense of closeness and warmth we felt within our families back home. One can always say that there need not be an occasion for giving presents and one can give any time during the year, but to me, rituals like this are a way of creating happy moments shared by family and close friends that we look forward to at least once a year.

I believe in giving and receiving gifts. Even today, I get excited when somebody gives me a gift. Many people would agree with me that you feel special and cared for when you receive a gift. I simply love to give gifts; I love to make people feel special. Giving a gift is my way of showing that I care for that person. 

We don’t give gifts to anyone. In my case, I think I give gifts to my close friends, family members, and colleagues. I always buy a gift for a person who is kind to me, who helps me out when I need help and support. Like for instance, when I got my current job, the person who was leaving the position, spent a lot of time training me. I gave her a beautiful farewell gift. That was my way of saying, “Thank you for your help and time”. She loved the gift and was very happy to receive it.

I love giving and receiving thoughtful gifts. In fact, my husband complains that I spend too much money on buying gifts. I spend lots of time shopping around to buy gifts. I think of things like how this person would like this gift, is this gift appropriate? Would this person use it? I buy unique things to gift. My gifts also have to be of very good quality. Its okay with me if the gifts cost more, but I feel the person who receives it should remember it for a long time. 

My gift giving experience hasn’t always been very pleasant though. So far, I’ve given beautiful gifts, but hardly received anything nice in return. Sometimes, I’ve given gifts to some people, who have even failed to acknowledge and send me a thank-you note. Some people have gifted me something very cheap in return. Some have just taken my gifts on birthdays and other occasions but haven’t given me anything on my birthday. I know that we should give for the sake of giving…but still these things hurt me a lot. 

Today I have some set rules for gift giving. I give without expecting anything in return. I give gifts to my close friends, to those who help me and are kind to me, and also give to those who need it. If I give something to someone who needs it, it’s a rewarding experience. I also like to give charity to those who truly deserve it. For instance, I gave a Harry Potter video to my neighbor's children because they couldn’t afford one, and the kids wanted to see the movie. I feel very good about giving such kinds of gift. .

By nature, I’m a giver. I think I’ll always give. I wish I had more money so that I can give more.